I guess I'm feeling down right now. I'm missing what I once had, and now the feeling of being alone is all that surrounds me. Maybe because of schedules, we just don't seem to have anymore time... or maybe one doesn't want anymore time together. All I know is that the lonliness continues to bear down on me, and the punch is all that keeps me going.
...No wait. I know why I'm feeling down. There's a very special friend, who means a heck of a lot to me, that I have treated very poorly. I rarely ask them about how they are, but rather talk with them as if they didn't have any feelings at all. In many ways, I have been very selfish with them. I'm always expecting something from the friendship, when in truth, I really shouldn't be. My friend always seems to make me smile and cheer me up, whether it be a simple bedtime story, what is said in our chats, or a funny gift, and so I feel that I'm snuffing them whenever we see each other and when we talk. Why? Simply because I have the mindset of me, rather than HER, in my head. That, I feel, is what I'm guilty of, and moreover, what I am eternally sorry for.
As I mentioned earlier, I'm missing what I once had. I guess it's difficult for me to see changes, especially ones that effect me personally. Regardless, YOUR'RE very important to me, YOUR'RE very special to me, YOU'RE the one who cheers me up, YOUR friendship is sometimes what keeps me going. I know I don't always show it, but it truly is how I feel, and I apologize if my care for you has not been shown in the past.
